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Published: 2010/10/28

Leaked Park Service Permit Unveils Details of Stewart-Colbert Rally

Comedy Central’s own Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert’s much hyped “Rally to Restore Sanity and/or Fear” finally acquired the necessary permit from the National Park Service. In contrast to the secrecy surrounding the event up until this point, the NPS made the 60-plus page document public and the play-by-play timeline reveals some savory musical guests.

The festivities are planned to begin at 10 am this Saturday at the National Mall in Washington and by noon, The Roots should be onstage. If the event plays out as planned in the document, we can expect performances by Jeff Tweedy, Mavis Staples, Sheryl Crow and a few other to-be-announced musicians and comedians.

The rally was planned as a response to Glenn Beck’s “Restoring Honor” gathering that took place back in August and has gained momentum with a hush-hush marketing campaign and endorsements from the likes of Oprah who gave audience members free tickets to the event.

Hordes of fans are expected to arrive by the bus full and according to the official website, simultaneous rallies in over 1,000 cities across the globe are going to be in full swing.

Stewart says this on rally’s site: “Think of our event as Woodstock, but with the nudity and drugs replaced by respectful disagreement; the Million Man March, only a lot smaller, and a bit less of a sausage fest; or the Gathering of the Juggalos, but instead of throwing our feces at Tila Tequila, we’ll be actively not throwing our feces at Tila Tequila. Join us in the shadow of the Washington Monument.”

Here is the schedule as it appears in the document:

10:00 a.m.: The pre-pre-show begins with videos and music on the jumbotron to keep the gathering crowd friendly and entertained.

Noon: The pre-show starts with a performance from The Roots.

12:40: A comedian (to be determined) warms up the audience.

12:57: A video countdown with a show introduction.
1:00: The show kicks off with the national anthem by a musical guest (to be announced).

1:05: Mr. Stewart welcomes the crowd – whose projected size is ballooning daily. Currently, there are 200,000 sign-ups on the official Facebook page alone.

1:20: Mr. Colbert enters, and two actors – Don Novello and Sam Waterston – perform readings.

1:40: Jeff Tweedy and Mavis Staple perform for 10 minutes, followed by Stewart and Colbert until 2 p.m.

2:15: Sheryl Crow performs for five minutes, followed by speakers and guests (to be determined).

2:30: Musical guests (also still being lined up) come on.

2:40: The show turns to a pre-taped sequence – The Sanity and Fear Awards.

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