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"Carrying the Torch"
by Tina Campbell (tinareeno1@aol.com)

At first I thought that I really couldn't contribute to what she had to say because I've never been to a dead show. I missed out on witnessing first hand "where it all began" so to speak. Of course, anyone who can accumulate and retain information about a subject can be made to understand it once they gain first-hand experiences that relate. You don't have to have been through a war to be moved to tears at the sight of the Arlington cemetary with those vast expanses of headstones stretched out before you. Upsetting analogy, I'm sorry.. but it's the first one I could think of and with 4 English classes worth of reading to do after I finish this, I don't have much time to work out another one. Point being, just because I've never been a deadhead doesn't mean that I can't relate my own experiences to back up her argument. Knowing the background, meeting people who were a part of it and seeing how the same values, attitudes and beliefs seem to run parallel make it pretty evident that Strangefolk (as well as a lot of other bands of the same genre) are not only keeping that spirit alive, but breathing a new life into it as well.

It took me a long time to find out where I belong as far as different groups of people go. Having lived just outside of Boston my whole life, I found that a lot of the people I encountered were very focused on monetary gain.. who had the brand names on their clothes, who drives the coolest car, who has the most friends with the most connections, etc, etc. and I always knew that none of that was important to me. My mom is a single parent, she inherited our house (and all the bills and debt that went with it) when my grandmother died in '85. For as long as I can remember, she's been working 2 jobs just to get by. Times were tough and we weren't always living comfortably.. barely scraping by was the norm for the majority of my life. Sometimes we would go a month without oil in the winter, relying on our fireplace as a sole source of heat. My mom has been my best friend, confidant and everything to me since birth. I tell her everything about my life and what I'm up to because she doesn't judge me, punish me or force me to do anything I don't want to do. Our relationship is built on mutual respect, trust and love.. and that's what important to me. Sure, nice things and money to buy them with is great.. but it's the people in your life who make living it worth while. Needless to say, the materialistic attitudes I had become acustomed to through peers and accquaintances just didn't fly with me. I'm just not really all that concerned with status... but to find people in the shadow of the Boston skyline who shared my attitude wasn't easy.

I found Phish around 93 or so thanks to a friend of mine who went away to school and wound up with a Phishead for a roomate. After getting into that "scene" (for lack of a better word).. I found it had a lot to offer in contrast to the values I was faced with at home. Tape trading as opposed to selling, miracles, people who would just smoke you up and not expect you to match them.. hell, better if you couldn't.. good karma ;). From there I found out about the Dead; that all these things, these attitudes, the friendliness, sharing, concern for others, etc. were a direct result of the culture that surrounded them and then began to flourish among their fans back in the 60's. I started to get interested in their music around early '95.. a billion deadheads can't be wrong, right? But then Jerry died. I immediately pulled away from persuing the interest because I knew that I liked what I had heard so far and to get swept away only to have the knowledge that I'd never see a live show made me apprehensive. Yeah, I know.. but the music is still there.. even though I couldn't go to a show, I can still enjoy the music. That's true, but imagine having that love, knowing that "there's nothing like a Grateful Dead concert" and never being able to experience one for yourself. That debate tore at me for a while.. but I think I've reached a happy medium: I'll buy CD's when I can, listen to any live tapes that come my way.. but I'm not going to put any effort into making them "my band".

Strangefolk is "my band". Phish was for a while, but it was more the people I met, friendships that came out of my association with them and that sense of sharing the same views with those people than it was the music. Don't get me wrong, the music was amazing too.. that's what drew me in initially, but it was that identification that made me stick around and get really wrapped up in it. Then the crowds started getting to be a bit much for me, I needed that sense of connection with other people.. but actually finding people like that in that sea of tour rats, vendors and drug dealers just out to make some cash off the lot scene started turning me away. Then.. I found Strangefolk. I preferred them to Phish because I like to be able to get into the lyrics just as much as the music. For me, Phish has a tremendous amount to offer instrumentally.. but falls pretty short in the lyrical depth dept.

So, back to my point of carrying the torch. For me, that's a big part of the appeal. It's the music first and foremost - how it makes you feel, how you can relate to most of the songs, they way it makes you dance even though your body's so tired you want to collapse.. but it's so much more than that. It's the good times, it's the people you meet, how you'll see them over and over, make great friendships, etc, etc. In that sense, Strangefolk (as well as many other bands of the same genre) are definately carrying the torch since the Dead was the first band to claim such a closeness and comraderie in their fans. I do regret that I didn't "discover" the Dead in the years that preceeded Jerry's death. However, that torch is burning bright and covering more ground every day because of the bands who work hard to keep it going... so I can't really say I missed out, can I?